


Unexpected

by purplebass



Category: The Last Hours Series - Cassandra Clare, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-02
Updated: 2020-10-02
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:33:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,208
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26773702
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/purplebass/pseuds/purplebass
Summary: A Thomastair one shot using the prompt: "You are not alone". Alastair telling Thomas about the trauma he faced with Elias.
Relationships: Alastair Carstairs & Thomas Lightwood, Alastair Carstairs/Thomas Lightwood
Kudos: 59
Collections: Thomastair





	Unexpected

Alastair left the council room before the verdict, feeling sick to his stomach. Although he hadn’t wanted to be there, he knew that it was his responsibility to be present. Not only to hear for himself how the Enclave would judge Elias, but to avoid that his mother and sister would come. Layla couldn’t attend because she was a minor anyway, but his mother, despite being six months pregnant, had insisted she wanted to come. Alastair had convinced her to stay home instead, claiming she needed to rest. At least, this was the excuse he used with her. Truth be told, he hadn’t wanted to risk his mother’s health by making her come because he had a gut feeling about this whole trial.

As the Enclave judged Elias as not guilty but ordered him to be detained at home for the moment to see how he would behave, Alastair’s heart started pounding. It had happened a lot recently, but he wasn’t worried. It was just his heart trying to cope with the situation, right?

Alastair walked away from the doors and leaned his back on the wall. He touched his chest and closed his eyes. The beating grew stronger, and he felt out of breath. He grew restless. The other members of the Enclave would be out in a couple of minutes, Elias included, and he didn’t want them to witness him in such state. He needed to leave, but when he tried to stand, he saw the hallway spin before his eyes, and a foreign hand caught his arm.

“Are you okay?” Not foreign. _Thomas’_ hand.

“This is none of your concern, Lightwood,” he replied icily. He didn’t want attention and receiving it from one of the people whom he tried to avoid these days was even worse. He didn’t want any pity. He opened his mouth to answer, seeing that Thomas hadn’t let him go. But he refrained when he heard noises coming from the council room. Alastair closed his eyes, resigned. He didn’t care anymore at this point. Let them see him like that. But Thomas had a different idea. He dragged Alastair by the arm and entered the first room on their left before shadowhunters would spread in the hallway.

Alastair still felt dizzy and used his hand to find support on the wall. The place looked like a break room, furnished with a bare table and a dark sofa with no pillows on it.

“It would be better if you sat down,” a voice said behind him, and he remembered that Thomas was there. And, most importantly, still holding him by the arm.

He glanced at him, but the movement caused him to lose balance. Thomas caught him again and led him to the only spot available to sit in the room and sat down next to him. Alastair wanted to protest. He wanted to say something hurtful to send him away and be alone with his thoughts, but the truth was that he didn’t want to be alone. He covered his face with his hands until he didn’t feel his heart racing anymore and his breath had returned normal. He didn’t know how much time had passed, but when he chanced a glance at his side, he saw that Thomas was still there.

“Are you feeling better?” Thomas asked with concern, frowning.

“You seem truly worried, Lightwood.”

“Why shouldn’t I be?”

Alastair laughed softly. “I thought you and I had nothing to do with each other anymore after my sister’s engagement party.”

“It doesn’t mean I can’t check on you,” he replied. “You didn’t see your face earlier.”

Alastair wanted to say that he didn’t need to. He knew that he was shocked beyond comprehension and hurt. Betrayed. And wanted to yell that Elias – he wouldn’t call him his father – was a fraud and needed to be locked somewhere far away because he was dangerous. He didn’t care about himself, he just wished Elias to stay clear of Layla and Sona. “I hate him,” he finally declared.

“Your father?”

Alastair ignored the label and continued. “He said a bunch of lies in there, and they believed him. But he is not trustworthy. He led the members of his search group to the wrong place, and you know why? Because he’s an alcoholic. Did he mention it to them? Of course not, because he wants to save whatever dignity he thinks he has left. But I know better, and I…” he stopped abruptly and gawked at Thomas, who was frowning. “I shouldn’t have said anything.”

“On the other hand, I’m glad you talked,” he confessed, managing a smile. “I didn’t want to say it because it’s still your father, but I thought something was off. His voice shook the entire time and his story was not coherent. Why did they believe him so easily?”

“Because he’s good with words. And he’s _not_ my father, Lightwood,” Alastair replied, a bit harshly than intended. “He hasn’t been ever since I found him passed out in front of hour old mansion in Paris. I was nine. I remember my mother and Layla were in the living room. There were guests, but for some reasons, Elias still was nowhere in sight. I thought it was odd, but he had started coming home later than usual and my mother wasn’t worried either. In the end, our guests left. Mother and Layla went to bed, but I stayed rooted to the window, waiting for Elias to come. I fell asleep there, and when I woke up, I saw a figure lying on the steps. It was snowing, and I hurried to him to drag him inside before anyone would notice. He reeked of alcohol. When I helped him on the sofa, he blurted out that he had been late because he had been drinking like I suspected. He woke up out of his stupor to tell me not to say anything to anyone, that he wouldn’t do it again. And as the stupid kid I was, I obliged. For years.”

“I didn’t know,” Thomas murmured. “I’m -“

Alastair casted a tentative glance at him. “Don’t. Don’t say it.” There wasn’t any admonishment in his words, he realized, but imploration.

“I just wanted to say that I’m thinking you’ve had to endure too much already. But you are not alone, Carstairs,” Thomas confessed with a grin.

“What does this mean?”

Alastair patiently waited for Thomas’ answer, but the door opened abruptly before he could say something. They both turned to see the intruder, and Alastair froze in his place. It was Elias. He hated him for interrupting, but at the same time, he thought he had already opened himself too much for the day. And to the person he least expected to. He wondered if something had changed between them.

“Oh, Alastair. There you are. I thought you’d left already,” Elias Carstairs said. “Come, we must leave. The Silent Brothers have other things to do.”

Alastair casted one last glance at Thomas and offered him his hand. Thomas was in disbelief, but he shook hands with him. “I’ll see you around, Lightwood.”

“Definitely,” Thomas agreed, leaving Alastair to face his fate, hoping he wouldn’t fall under the influence of Elias again.


End file.
